Where to find this idea:
Bittersweet: How Sorrow and Longing Make Us Whole by Susan Cain
You are cozied up in your room. A soulful melody is playing through your headphones. It’s filling you up with sadness and melancholy. But hold on for a sec, it’s also sparking a sense of beauty and transcendence. What is that feeling? That blend of bitter and sweet.
A complex and powerful feeling of bittersweet recognizes that light and dark are forever connected, that sorrow and longing can lead to experiencing and creating beauty. Bittersweet is about seeing sadness as a powerful force for creativity, unity and even joy, instead of seeing it as something unhealthy or reserved for losers, like the culture of normative sunshine often makes us believe. And we’re not talking about depression here — a word that’s tossed around so casually that it’s harming those who are really struggling with it. We’re talking about sadness as an emotion that has its purpose in our lives like any other emotion.
There is something uplifting in bittersweet. Artists particularly have that ability to transform pain into beauty and transcendence. Take Leonard Cohen’s music as an example (or any music written in a minor key). It’s sad, but it makes you feel more than sadness — you feel beauty, love and awe. This phenomenon even has a name — the paradox of tragedy.
But artists are not the only ones who have this wonderful ability to turn sorrow into something beautiful and creative. We all do. We just use different mediums. Some of us might pour our hearts into writing, others might find solace in music. Some people find joy in crafting a life filled with simple, everyday beauties, while others dedicate themselves to creating a better world to live in. The most beautiful people are those who have traversed through adversity and emerged from its depths. Sorrow fosters empathy and humility, while broadening the understanding of common humanity.
Sadness also has the power to unite us and build compassion. It’s during moments like funerals, when we share in collective sorrow, that we can truly sense a profound unity between souls. Our impulse to be there for someone who is hurting sits in the same location in our brain as our need to breathe, digest food and protect our babies. It’s part of being human.
Some of us are more melancholic than others, but there is space for sad songs, rainy days and tears in all of us. There is also space for happy songs, sunshine and smiles in all of us. There is a little bittersweetness in all of us. And that’s what makes life beautiful.